Don’t Be the “Waiter”

The only thing that comes to a waiter is a tip.

The motivational speaker/guru, Les Brown, once said: “good things come to those who wait, but only the good things that were left behind by the one who hustled.”

We often move through life feeling as if tomorrow will bring us that extra ounce of motivation that we need to move toward our dreams. Most of us feel as if tomorrow has a surplus of energy injected into it, an energy that today we would never dare tap into.

The good news is today has just as much motivation in it as tomorrow does. The bad news is tomorrow has just much motivation as today.

Wishful thinking and aimlessly waiting on tomorrow, “a better day,” to begin that project or start that business will have you in a place Zig Ziglar once called “One Day Isle” which is right next to “Isle Never” in Safeway: as in the safe way to nowhere.

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In a nutshell, living for tomorrow is the most dangerous thing that you could ever do for your future self. In waiting for tomorrow to begin, you are literally preparing yourself for a time and place that does not exist. As pseudoscience or woowoo as this sounds, you truly only have this moment. Right here, right now is the only thing that actually exists. All ‘tomorrow’ is is a representation of another “right here, right now.”

Thus, if you wish to see any sort of lasting change in your life, do “it” now, whatever your “it” is. I wasted far too much time and too many “laters” to ever let myself into such a trap again and it truly hurts my heart when I see those around me doing the same. We act as if our time is limitless, as if we will always be able to achieve our greatest self. We will forgo going to the gym for the third night in a row because Shameless just put out their third season and I means it’s not like the gyms going anywhere right? We throw away precious moments in the morning that could be used for mediation or planning and instead dedicate that time to scrolling and liking.

We love to claim that patience is a virtue but what we practice is far from virtuous. The fact of the matter is patience and waiting are not related, in fact they are not even in the same species. Patience is related to the work that takes place during the period of growth, while waiting is a passive act of “do nothingness.”

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I am by no means saying there is something wrong with relaxation and unwinding to something that will take your mind off of constantly doing, however when it’s time to do, don’t mistake not doing for doing. 

Preparation is a key element to success in any sphere of life but waiting and preparing are again unrelated. There is a difference between studying an industry before you enter it and waiting for the “right time” to get into an industry. Preparing for a test and thinking about preparing for a test are not the same thing, I could not emphasize this point enough. 

Do not take for granted the time that you have been allocated and the visions that have been placed in you. When you are sparked with an idea, you must act on it as fast as possible because the longer you wait the further it fades.

Tinashe Hwande

(edited by Tayla Hasselbach)

What Is Leadership?

Leadership is inspiring. It is taking a stand and motivating others to think, create, accomplish — whatever the task may be. It is creating an open space where effective communication and compromise may occur in order to confidently reach a goal in a timely manner. It is taking on the responsibility of the outcomes of those decisions and facilitating reflection on what could be done better in the future. It is doing all of these things from a pure heart with the sole intention of helping others be the best person they can be in the world.

While pondering who has demonstrated leadership in my life, my sophomore 2 clinical instructor, Amber Quelvog, came to mind. She was one of the best teachers I have ever had and it is through her leadership that I grew exponentially as a nurse this past semester. She was a leader in that she inspired us to be our own leaders, to trust ourselves, and to feel confident and in the right place on the floor in the hospital. She led not by telling us what to do but by guiding us as we used our critical thinking skills to solve the issue at hand on our own. She facilitated our self-reflection as well as gave constructive criticism in a positive manner. I truly look up to her and hope to be a nurse, teacher, and leader like her.

Nursing School Archives (May 2015)

By: Tayla Hasselbach

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A Culture of Complaining

My fitness mentor, Coach Bobby Bluford, one of the most brutally honest men that I know, once said “nobody cares if you win or lose.” Though I am a fan of truth served with no sugar, this statement caused me to cringe. Not because of its “harshness,” but due to its unrelenting truth. We all see the crowd cheer for the winner and cry for the second place in a two person competition, but in day-to-day reality nobody cares if you follow your dreams or not. The irony of this idea runs deep because it is almost necessary for some to live out their visions in order to inspire the other potential dream chasers, however whether or not you have the faith necessary to take actions towards your goals is something that nobody cares about until you do.

Those who dream but do not do, seldom have an impact on those around them, let alone the world as a whole. Einstein, Joan of Arc, Picasso, Oprah, these individuals changed the course of history profoundly, however if they chose to live in their doubt and ego-driven fear, they would have had no impact on our society. As much as it now seems like the world would have never been the same if these people had not existed, if they had not pursued the unseen, the world would still go on. Nobody cares until you do.

If you are somebody who now leads a team of employees or is working towards growth then you understand the former statement. The fact that you cared enough to bring your vision into reality is the reason why people not only care, but have become invested in you and your vision for a better world; some because they rely on you for a paycheck and others because they have fallen in love with your offerings.

Whether you’re a one person business or have a fully staffed company, nobody cares whether you grow or not so long as you don’t. Your employees would love promotions and to say they work for an organization that is doing big things, but then again they could just move on to the next company who’s not afraid to scale themselves and provide their services to the world abroad.

I did not create this chapter as a way to hurt your feelings or even as a form of tough love, I wrote this to inspire you to care whether or not your company grows. Until this point you might not have cared, because if you did you would have been taking those actions that you wrote out in your business plan five years ago.

There is no secret recipe for giving a damn about growth, but there is a way in which you can practice seeing the bigger picture of what the growth of your organization will do. As I mentioned in the opening statement of this chapter, growth does not just affect you, but all those around you. As you probably know the more companies of value that open up within a certain region, the more the value of the region goes up.  Granted the question of value is subjective, however the reality is that development spawns development.

When you make a decision to care more about people and look to serve them before all else, it is not just you who feels better but every single human being that you come into contact with thereafter. Your decision to be a better person or as one of my earliest clients stated “just not be an asshole,” has ripple effects throughout your community. Your kids, parents, friends, customers, employees, and all others who are in your circle of influence will be affected by your character growth and in turn those they come in contact with will have the same happen for them. Exponential growth.

So just image what can happen if you’re able to supply a thousand more customers with the freshest produce within the marketplace or create a law firm with a thousand lawyers that are dedicated to true justice for the innocent. It does not matter what industry you are in, caring is caring and it is felt when it is shown. Caring is contagious and everybody benefits from it. We’ve become a culture obsessed with “IDGAF.” If you do not know what this abbreviation means, I dare you to look it up. The phrase “I don’t care” has become more popular than it should be, though its use is in vain; humans by default were crafted to care, if not about one thing then at least another.

Put the same care that you put into the less important things in life into your business and you will see it grow into something that serves many and not just your own day-to-day needs.

Tinashe Hwande

(edited by Tayla M. Hasselbach)

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Remember To Breathe

The first time I ever met my partner in growth and soulmate I was in a phase of my life where I was essentially going nowhere at an extremely fast pace. At the time, I was doing a sales job for a meal prep company working off of commission… and for anybody who’s ever had to make a living off of commisions, I am sure you know how taxing it can be.

My days were filled with prospecting customers, creating sales pitchs, meeting with customers, digging into sales books and such. I had become used to moving from one side of town to the other, meeting potential clients and pushing a product that I didn’t even believe in (a vegan selling meat based meal plans, can somebody say hippo crit?). I wouldn’t admit it then, but quite frankly I had lost myself. Mentally, I was the same person that I am right now, however there was this cognitive dissonance between the person I was and who actually wanted to be. I had forgotten about the simple things that actually mattered. One of those things being my breath.

My partner did not directly tell me to breathe but did what most great impactors and influencers do; lead by example. I noticed her taking the deepest breaths I had ever seen as she sat in the front seat of a mutual friends car. I could not help but notice her breath more so than the conversation taking place at the time. Intuitively, I followed suit. And almost in an instant, I remembered. I remembered to breathe.

In this rapidly changing world, complicated has become the new norm and a form of simplicity within itself (notice how I did not say evolving world as many would say). Don’t get me wrong, technology has definitely made it easier for us to live day by day. After all, our ancestors struggled to merely survive most of the time, whereas today we seldom have to think of our own mortality.

We have taken the complexities of human life and solved them through algorithms, apps and Adsense. The one problem we have yet to solve is the one of remaining human throughout this process of perceived progress.

Being a self diagnosed workaholic, I am as guilty as any when it comes to getting caught up in the ever turning hamster wheel that is modern society. In fact, most of us have become accustomed to living our lives on this perpetual track to nowhere. We wake up, scroll down, brush that, grab this, eat that, scroll up, look for that, drive this, eat that, park this, type that, eat this, talk smack… and this all takes place before your 30-minute lunch break.

We forget about the gift that is the present moment as we go through the day taking shorter and shorter anxiety, stress, worry, and doubt-filled breathes. We view the perpetual hamster wheel as being the norm, yet the rat race did not exist within the first million or so years of our existence. What did exist, however, was stillness, patience, reflection, community, connection and BREATH.

I understand that it is close to impossible to spend your entire life breathing with intention every step of the way… just take this as a friendly reminder to take a moment out of your day to breathe.

Tinashe Hwande

(edited by Tayla M. Hasselbach)